PUNK ROCK SELF-HELP

My wet nurse is a COW!

Friday, May 25, 2012

I'm sure the original cover sold a ton of issues of TIME magazine. But what "issue" did it really uncover? Some would say that it was sensationalist, misogynist, made woman feel less than if they chose Not to breast feed & promoted the model type. No one could believe that this MILF was the real life mother to the 3 year old boy but... She Is!

The cover story was based on attachment parenting methods where woman are trying to prevent their children from feeling detached by giving breast milk longer...

Yadda...Yadda...


We are so concerned & even outraged with a Mother breast feeding her child until 5 or 6.

But...

It's universally accepted that most people until the day they die will drink Cow's BREAST MILK.

Isn't that odd?

I am a full grown ADULT & I am still breast feeding from a Cow's teet!!!!

I went to an allergist then a nutritionist about my seasonal allergies & they both said that Dairy enflames my particular condition. If I could cut it out altogether I wouldn't feel phlegmy or be as lethargic.

I HAVE TRIED TO CUT OUT COW' S MILK.

Um..

It's really hard :(

For me.

Not bc I can't.
But bc I DON'T want to :(
I LOVE the taste! That sounds so nasty:
"I LOVE the taste of Cow's BREAST Milk"

EW!!!!

You see...

I'm allergic to almonds so I can't drink almond milk. Soy milk tastes like powdered water & cocunut milk is syrupy weird.

What's my alternative:

I choose to take my coffee, tea, chocolate syrup, cereal, & cookies, with milk from a mother I have never met. A Cow who has been pumped with steroids to keep her lactating. & Humans came up with a f'd up justification that supposedly it feels good when they milk her bc her teet's are throbbing from her body becoming accustomed to being a lifetime long, human's wet nurse.

EW!!!

But...

Chances are I too will die drinking & enjoying Cow's breast milk. Knowing full well it's not good for my body or the Cow's body.

Selfish gal :(

But it's not MY fault!

Blame my mom bc she kept her tit in her bra & sacrificed a cow's teet.

Besides, no one has weened me off of it!!!

You guys....
I have a new condition: Attachment Moo Methods, I might have just made it up but it's real!

For me.

I get Separation Anxiety whenever I can't eat...

Butter, cream, yogurt, CHEESE!!! Cow's breast milk products are just So Yummy!

Today, bless whatever milk you drink. Almonds we're squished to make it! Mammals were poked & prodded! & I will work on never calling Milk: "Cow's BREAST Milk" again!


EWWW!!!!

Me in Barcelona ;) 

Xo

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